Some might say I don’t deserve this scholarship because I live in a decent house. But here’s the thing: Is it my house? My Nanay, who has raised me since I was three after my parents separated – doesn’t own the house either, it belongs to her brother.
Recently, he visited for a month and I got to say, I didn’t enjoy it. It’s not that I’m ungrateful, it’s just that it felt like, just because his unmarried, older sister and I live under his roof, doesn’t give him the right to order us around like we’re robots. You can ask me to do things, but a simple “thank you” would have been nice. He never does! He does that to my Nanay too and I can’t stand it. That’s your sister we’re talking about, how could you treat her like that? You don’t even help with the chores, yet you boss us around as if you own our lives!
That’s one of a million reasons why I feel like I’m in the ground zero of life. I haven’t proven anything yet. Even the house I’m living in now doesn’t really feel like home. I want to be able to provide for my Nanay without owing anyone anything – no
“utang na loob” from anyone. Imagine raising a child, especially one who isn’t even yours, and giving them the love they never got from their own parents. It’s just incredible!
That’s exactly why I’m so desperate to give back and honestly, I’m under so much pressure right now. My Nanay is getting older every day and I don’t feel like I’m “there” yet – not even close to where I need to be. People say life isn’t a race, and BINI sings about it, but honestly, I feel like it is. I feel like I’m constantly chasing the clock, racing against time with each day that passes. It’s a never-ending cycle of “what ifs” that haunts me.
This is why I am incredibly thankful and grateful for the Rudy & Fe Romanillos Scholarship, Inc. (NGO), which has made such a huge difference in my life and my pursuit of education. I will use this opportunity as a stepping stone to reach my goals and finally achieve that “win” in life. I promise to carry the name of this program with honor and responsibility.
Again, thank you so much!
